Much to my mother's dismay, we didn't have an appropriate sized life jacket for Clare. Phil and I have decided to start a book called, "How to Raise a Child Florida Cracker Style." This will be Chapter One: Bring your infant on open water without safety gear.
Chapter Two: Nurse your six-week old...on the water...without appropriate safety gear...while steering the boat with your feet (YES, I did that a time or two. I like to call it multi-tasking rather than poor parenting.)
Chapter Three: Bring a live shark into the boat with your infant...who isn't wearing appropriate safety gear.
Chapter Four: Let your daughter (who is strapped to her carseat rather than appropriate safety gear) pet the shark that just about bit daddy's hand.
Chapter Five: Use the motor of a boat to soothe your six-week old into a sound slumber.Chapter Six: Bathe your daughter, upon returning from the open water without age-appropriate lifesaving gear, in the kitchen sink...with hand soap (all of our "baby appropriate" soaps were at home...and she had spit up on her sweaty neck one too many times).
Chapter Seven: To be continued....
Phil pulled this chunk of sponge up with the anchor.
Phil capped off the evening with a box of oysters...one of his favorite treats!
Mmm...Mmm...GOOD!!! A box of fifty oysters was gone within twenty minutes.
This was a beautiful end to a wonderful day!
7 comments:
i swear i laughed so hard how in each chapter you mentioned not having appropriate safety gear. you make me laugh so hard. well today we had our first car wash for diabetes. the idea was started by mikela colon and I. we raised $333.67 !!! yayy!! the next event will be soon.
I agree with McKinzie. I laughed SO HARD at that!!! I loved each chapter, and how it further emphasized your daughter's lack of safety equipment.
It sounds like it was a wonderful day!! I love that you are both so adventurous! Living alone, I seem to have lost some of my adventurousness. So when I'm bored and would normally ask a roommate or Joe to go do something crazy, there's no one to ask!
I can't wait to see Ann's response. : )
Three cheers to the First Born Multi-tasker!!!
I think you could be a guest speaker at Michael Scott's "Safety Training" seminar. I mean, jumping off an office building onto a giant Bouncy Castle and strapping your child to an anchor are pretty much same-same.
hahaha! This is great! I love your water-loving family and all your adventures. Those pics and stories are priceless! :)
I have obviously failed to teach my children water safety.
Here is a refresher course.
#1 Learn to Swim
#2 If you can't swim wear a life jacket
#3 If you are a parent of a child who can't swim, put a life saving device on them.
#4 If you don't know these rules, stay on dry land.
#5 Sharks and babies are both made by God, but God probably did not intend for them to snuggle together.
I love my grandbaby and want to see her grow up.
love, mom, pat, grandma
I have to add one more of Pat's water safety rules:
#6 No screaming while playing in the water...they sound like "death screams" :)
Corrie, do you remember that one? It has certainly stuck with me though the years!
I am so jealous of your mini-vaca...up here in MI it is 60 and rainy! Winter is near :(
Clare is growing so much, what a little cutie! I think she is looking more and more like mom :)
Leslie
Hilarious story! Three cheers for living dangerousy!!! Sally D.
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